Two years ago today, David and I learned that we'd lost our first baby. There are still really very few days that go by that I don't think about that baby. I used to wonder what that child would have been like and who he or she would have looked like. Now, when I think about that child, I immediately think..."but we wouldn't have Campbell." I firmly believe that God is in every detail of our lives, and I believe wholeheartedly that Campbell was absolutely meant to be our first child here on earth. She has been an incredible blessing, and she's brought so much healing to my heart after our loss.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be so acutely aware of February 25th (the day we found out that I'd miscarried) or September 18th (my due date), but those days were important turning points for me, and I've decided that I'll probably always mark them somehow. It may not always be in a public forum, but I'll always set aside a little time on those dates to remember that tiny life that taught me so much.
This poem was a part of the Louisville Walk to Remember promotional material that was sent out last October, and I thought it was a perfect way to remember our sweet little one today:
Still -
Heart from
My heart,
Body
From mine -
Dream:
Never awakening,
Held safely
In the cells
Of my body
In the light
Of my soul:
I feel you
Still little one,
Missing yet
Ever here.
--David Hiram Weller
